I’m not stupid. I know your with him. I know you guys are together.
You don’t have to make it sound like you guys aren’t. Even if he is treating you like shit as always, I know you always go back to him either way.
I can accept that now. Even if it kills me inside. Even if you didn’t tell me straight up and I had to find out on tumblr once again (and I kinda just figured it out with you guys fighting today I guess).
Cause in the end, you two have way more history with each other… than I can ever even hope to ever have with you.
The thought of a relationship making you feel sick? Okay I get that you wanna break up and be independent and explore the world.
I really do admire that. We’re still both young. I have to find myself and my purpose just as you have to find yours. There’s so much more things to do than just settle down so early at such a young age.
I’ve come to terms with that.
I can understand that.
But I hate that I’m beginning to question whether that was your vague way of telling me that you wanted to break up just so you can go back to “him” once again.
Does that mean .. I make you sick? .. And he doesn’t?
I don’t know.
But whatever I guess. A month from now everything’s going to most likely change.
And even if any of what I’m saying is really gonna matter or not..
In the end
I just want you to know that…
You’re still the last thing on my mind when I go to bed..
And the first thing on my mind when I wake up every morning…
I’m always going to care about you.
I’m always going to be there for you.
I’m always going to remember all the times we’ve spent together and feeling like nothing else in the world mattered.
I’m ALWAYS going to feel that I was SO LUCKY to be able to call you mine.
So please. If there’s ever anything wrong… Just talk to me?
I know I’m not your boyfriend anymore and I’m just your friend I guess but just talk to me if you ever need to vent.
And if it’s something you can’t tell me
just tell me the truth even if it hurts.
I’d rather have the truth any day
than let my fucked up imagination do the talking.
You mean so much to me.
Even if you don’t feel the same way anymore.
Like you once said. Don’t bottle shit up right?